Fear of Healing

You are sick for a purpose. But it’s not the purpose you think. It’s not that God has put upon you this spell of sickness that you can learn a valuable lesson. I mean, who is God if he has to hurt his son to learn, that just does not make sense at all. But you are sick because you want to be. You are getting something out of your sickness and that is why it has a very specific purpose for you.
That’s why taking medicine does not really heal your sickness, because your sickness is just a symptom, it’s not the source of the problem. And as you might have experienced before, when you remove a weed without it’s roots it will sooner or later grow back. So the sickness will come back again and again until the underlying problem has been solved and healed. So you are afraid of healing because you have set up this whole defense system not to be wholly joyous and open to communicate the pure love of God. Your sickness lets you stay small and lets you operate in the manner familiar to you. Yes, when you really question it and really look at the cause of the sickness, it does not make sense to keep it at all. That’s why you do everything not to find out what the cause of the sickness is. You don’t want to be healed, you don’t want to change. You don’t want your mind to be turned upside down and disappear into the heart of God, because you are so attached to what you think reality is. This reality that you judge as being true is beginning to crumble all around you. There is really no foundation for you to stand on anymore. And still the resistance to change is too big to actually let go of your identity. It’s always the same old story.
We have one problem – that is that we think we are separate from God – and one solution – that God who is all powerful just can’t be separate from you. And we are trying everything not to remember that premise. I don’t know what it will take for you to step out without knowing and let yourself be healed from all the ancient hurts you carry around. But I do know that reading this article is the beginning of what is going to be the best journey of your life. The journey home to your Father.