If I defend myself I am attacked
Who would defend himself unless he thought he were attacked, that the attack was real, and that his own defense could save him? And herein lies the folly of the defense; it gives illusions full reality, and then attempts to handle them as real. It adds illusions to illusions, thus making correction doubly difficult. And it is this you do when you attempt to plan the future, activate the past, or organize the present as you wish. (A Course in Miracles, Lesson 135)
In the moment when I let all my defenses go, the whole world is here to bless me. It is funny, that we always expect the worst of the other person. And never really question that. But when we really communicate and not take our first thought so serious, we always discover that everybody just gives and offers us everything, the love of the whole universe.