The prisoners

Two inmates broke out of the prison and when they were running away they come across a monastery. They wanted to hide in there and found two nuns working in the garden. They could not resist and started to rape the nuns. The one nun screamed out to God: “Father forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” The other nuns says:”Mine does.”

God is watching

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray, “Take only one. God is watching.”

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. One child whispered to another, “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.”